I think the Lord for my family and sometimes when they are honest it is brutel. I am in my last semester of Grad. school which means I have to do 75 hours of Diagnostician work on top of my teaching responsibilities. I also teach my daughter's Wednesday night class at church, keep up with a active infant and try to keep house. Needless to say I am also being treated by my OB/GYN for depression, which is not anything new since it runs in my family.
I am known for being independent and trying to do everything on my own. Needless to say I still am trying to do it all. This week I wrote down the wrong date for a important inserve so of course I went on the wrong day. I have manage to lock my son in the car at church and had to call the police or well a friend at church who is up high on the ladder of University PD call UPD for me.
Today I had my blood pressure checked at wrk just to humor a co-worker that was worried about how I was feeling. I normally run in the high 90s to about 105 on top. Don't ask me about my bottom number. Well when I had it checked it was 140/100. Which I guess is high because I was then sent home to see a doctor and when I got to the Dr. office my BP was 130/90, I know I'm under a lot of stress right now. I just think if I ask for help it will show that I'm either lazy or weak.
I feel like I am needing to prove to ALL of my family (immediate and extended) that I am a hard worker, caring person and a great wife, mother, daughter, aunt, cousin, neice, granddaughter, sister.
2 comments:
You don't have to prove anything to anyone. You only have to believe in yourself, everything else will work itself out in the end.
I agree totaly with Crystal! Stop trying to prove yourself to everyone else and just focus on you! You can't keep going at this pase without killing yourself! Let others help. That's what family and friends are for. Yes, someone somewhere may get dissapointed but you know what that is life! Not everything is flowers and candy! You have to learn to say NO. Sometimes you have to admit that you are over your head with things to do and back out of something. It is okay. Everyone has those times. You must take care of yourself for the sake of your children and your family!
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